Friday, December 3, 2010

Friday Wakeup

Strike one for Nebraska moving to the Big Ten. Fans and media alike accepting the notion that it is fine for the Blackshirts to become a slower, more plodding unit like its future brethren. No way. Add a tad of size over this year's linebackers, OK. Become mediocre, or flat-out bad, like the rest of the Big Ten's defenses....unacceptable. The goal is national titles, not beating Minnesota and Wisconsin on their crabgrass fields.

Further proof that Dan Beebe is lying about receiving death threats. Shit, even Tiger Woods filed a police report.

Great finish to a boring "Territorial Cup" game in Lebanon, aka Tucson last night. Arizona State did its best to save PYB's four-team parlay by blocking Alex Zendejas' extra point and sending the game into overtime, giving Arizona's Mildcats a chance to cover the 4.5-point spread. Then, in double OT, ASU's James Brooks blocked his second consecutive extra point to seal a 30-29 Sun Devil victory and seal the fate of our bet (no worry, the Phoenix Suns-Golden State overs failed to cover anyway).

The most entertaining part of this game, however, is making fun of the two fan bases in the crowd. ASU, whose "die-hard" fan base consists of transplanted dweebs from other regions of the country, acting like a win is life-or-death due to the fact that they've been on the Tempe campus for almost a whole semester! The alumni are even more hilarious, strutting around like they're Bill Gates because they started a construction or landscaping company 20 years ago during the height of the building boom in Arizona. They can even afford season tickets, a lease on a Lexus and the green fees at Phoenix's best public golf courses!

The Wildcat fans, however, are more polar opposites. There are the rich kids, enrolled from out-of-state thanks to big daddy's check book, who have to spend the next four years bragging to the friends back home about the great weather and acting like they weren't horrified when they got to Tucson to see that they were going to be residing in one of the biggest shitholes this side of the Gaza Strip. A few palm trees does not make us forget that the rest of the town looks like Nagasaki circa 1945. Who napalmed this bitch?

Even funnier are the rest of the deadbeats in the Arizona stadium.....and PYB can't decipher whether they just look like scumbags community-college transfers who are hoping to graduate from U of A's radiology tech program with a solid C average? Or just the lucky recipients or four free tickets, Wildcat hats, hot dogs and game programs from the latest raffle at the nearby Food City? Or just some of Tucson's finest transients who show up to the Wildcat games because the Oakland Raider game isn't until Sunday? Who knows, who cares.

OK, we'll admit the second picture looks better than the first....but the chick has no tits! She needs to move to Phoenix, get a fake rack, starting snorting copious amounts of cocaine, frequent the club scene for a few years...and basically get a life. Then she can screw a few Arizona Cardinals (maybe even pop out an illegit kid or two), hit rock bottom, marry a rich ASU grad with the personality of a flea who will accept a blonde coke slut even though she's screwed half the town and go into business in "real estate" selling luxury properties. Aaaaah, the FUCKING life.

Finally, two shocking developments from Lawrence, Kan. 1. KU's Jayhawks almost lost outright to UCLA despite being a 17.5-point favorite and 2. The referees bailed them out with a bullshit call. Farce. Can't wait for their annual second-round flameout in the Big Dance.

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