Sunday, June 8, 2014

Pussy Control

PYB is back.....and we're here to stay. So many of our favorite targets teed us up with easy opportunities this fine Sunday. Let's go:

-In addition to being a shitty basketball coach, Roy Williams is now exposed as a crook yet feigned surprise when Rashad McCants sang like a canary. Academic fraud -- no biggie.

-Drake Martinez quit before he got started in Lincoln because he needed a fresh start. Too bad his older brother didn't have the same gene. Anyway, everyone wins in this one and Chico State likely gets the backup third-down back it covets.

-Queen James. Cramps. Do we need to elaborate?

-And Horace Grant went on record with this before the Queen's Midol Moment. 72-10.

-PYB watched SportsCenter a couple weeks ago. One of the anchors had no idea who Ernest Givins was -- and admitted it on air. Tells you all you need to know about ESPN being a valid entity. A Google search also reveals rumors that Givins is/was gay -- can't believe the Worldwide Leader hasn't run that topic into the ground already.

-Watched the Bad Boys '30 For 30' last week. Watching the cheap shots and hard fouls that was mildly entertaining, especially when some that didn't even warrant an ejection would be grounds for a multi-game suspension and Congressional hearing today. However, acting like the Bad Boy craze swept the nation, when it was merely David Stern's bridge between the Bird/Magic era and the Jordan era, was a bit much. The two-hour episode should have been cut to 60 minutes, and Isiah Thomas is still a joke. (as if his walking off the court before the game against Chicago was over and running the CBA into the ground weren't proof enough)

-Finally, part of our recent backlog has been failure to watch the replay of the Nebraska football spring game. We finally got to it last week. Those of you who haven't seen it will be glad to know little has changed. Outside of a stray cat and a few grabass games/drills, the game was boring as always
and NU still has the same warts as always. Those of you who appreciate our glass-half-empty analysis, read on:

  • Tim Beck soldiered on with his Square Peg, Round Hole Offense -- dropping Tommy Armstrong back into the pocket time after time and forcing the young quarterback to make quick reads and force passes into tight spots over the middle of the field. Solid plan -- well, until Armstrong's first attempt was one of three interceptions thrown by NU QBs on the day. All over the middle. Hmmm.....
  • Ryker Fyfe is Nebraska's best passer. If NU insists on turning Armstrong into the next Ron Powlus, Bo Pinelli may as well sit  him now in favor of Fyfe, who will throw for 400 yards a game against bad teams before being entirely overwhelmed by any decent defense.
  • Byerson Cockrell looked good in coverage a few times. Hopefully, he doesn't go the way of Ciante Evans and get worse by the season.
  • The second-team defense ran on to the field late and gave up an easy touchdown. The process is definitely in place...
  • Will Shields made a cameo as a sideline reporter, and it was uncomfortable. It was uncomfortable of the turn-the-head and talk to somebody as loud as possible variety.
  • Pinelli ran the team through punt coverage drills, and the performance was awful. There were no live punts, however. Make sense for a team that has been absolutely pathetic in the return game for years. We're fine.
  • Imani Cross missed an easy block in pass protection. Great attribute for a 260-pound running back. He fooled many into thinking he's a Division I talent by making some big runs in garbage time.
  • Johnny Stanton debuted. He throws like shit, just like he did in high school. He engineered a false start on 3rd & 1 on his first series. Sounds like four-year starting QB material to Coach Pinelli....
  • The DJ blared the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Hello, 1991. But fear not, Husker fans, there will be a new guy running the tunes in the fall. Can't wait.
  • In one of the grabass moments, cheerleaders called plays for the offense. How cute. Unsurprisingly, they were less predictable than Beck's regular-season play calls. Either way, PYB says a team with so many executional flaws needs every repetition it can get in lieu of family-friendly novelty acts. The Lincoln Saltdogs play across the highway.
  • Zack Darlington was overwhelmed. He'll never play a down in Lincoln, green jersey or not.
  • NU finished the game by failing to score on a possession starting inside the ten yard line. The drive culminated with a 21-yard field goal, which accented a missed extra point earlier in the day. The kicking game is fine.

All we got. On to enjoy our Sunday. Enjoy yours. PYB