Wednesday, September 5, 2012

That's All, Folks

After having the television go out where we were watching the Nebraska-Southern Miss football game, PYB had to wait to watch the tape to chime in with its game one reviews. Let's get started, as we debate unloading a ton of cash on NU at UCLA this week. (Temper that thought w/ the fact that the Cornhuskers have no healthy, proven player who can go more than five carries without fumbling.

--Cameron Meredith sucks!! Sure, we've said it a thousand times. Lo and behold, it's still true. Porky has his technique down to a science this point: hand fight with the tackle, fail to shed a block all game, let the play get past him on either side, turn and waddle after the play until it ends. Don't believe us -- watch him for two or three series. It is sad. You can throw Baker Steinkuhler into the same category as Meredith, just subtract about 10 percent body fat.

If you think the fact that NU is burning three redshirts on the defensive line is a coincedence, then you're not Columbo. The front four is completely devoid of playmakers. Actually, completely devoid of anyone who can disrupt the offense more than once a game by accident. We're not looking for nitpicks, of course. We are pointing out glaring holes that will be targeted and abused as the season goes on.

--Taylor Martinez has a new throwing motion!! As has happened the last two seasons, media members and NU fans have popped a collective boner after T-Vagic's first big-stat game against a bad team. His throws did look a tad better. At least his arm raised above his head on certain throws and he even looked like a man a few times. However, let's wait to see what he does against even a mediocre defense. Watching the tape, there were a lot of completions into small windows that won't be there against faster opponents. There were also a lot of misses, where Martinez threw to the wrong side of the receiver and turned a 20-yard gain into an eight-yard catch.

All that said, Taylorina ran once for six yards. He did his pussy-assed slide at least twice. SO, he can't run, and is a sub-par passer. Why exactly doesn't NU get a pass-first QB who can distribute the ball to its bevy of receiving options? Anyone can hand off and pitch to the running backs.

--Linebackers: Hard to analyze much thus far, other than the facts that Alonzo Whaley showed glimpses of potential. Sean Fisher got a good score on his MCAT, so television announcers will have something positive to talk about when he gets burned and misses tackles regularly. We'll see if they can run down Brett Hundley, UCLA's talented dual-threat QB. PYB isn't feeling great about this matchup...remember Kain Colter of Northwestern? Well, we do and we also remember that the NU defense lost its only three good players from last season.

--Defensive backs: Incomplete due to no meaningful action or game situations. They did, however, show some depth and athletic ability. Mo Seisay is set to travel to Los Angeles, so we'll see if he can become a contributor or the next Armando Murillo.

--Special teams: Terrible. Hopefully, we can chalk up the kicking woes of Brett Maher as an exception. We'll see. BUT, Nebraska's golf pro/special teams coach should realize that special teams are a difference making proposition, especially when there is so much parity in today's game. Stuffing the team with nine white walkons won't cut it. Take a page for the mid-1990s when the kick teams were loaded with up-and-comers with speed and talent and even a couple starters. You know, guys who make plays? Not some dildo from Howells who has "earned" the chance by standing around for four years. it that hard a concept?

--Offensive Line: PYB abstains. Sure, NU racked up more than 600 yards. No false starts or stupid penalties. Now, let's see it against a good team, on the road, or even better.....a GOOD team on the ROAD....for four quarters!

--Receivers: Looked able, sure-handed, fast, strong. Good. Do they have anyone who can get it to them against worthy opponents? We say no. We hope we're wrong. We don't think we are.

--Running backs: Rex Burkhead looked great on his three carries. Without his steady presence and strong hands, the UCLA game could be dicey. We love Ameer Abdullah, but have doubts about whether he can be an every-down back, when a hammer inside the tackles is needed and the NU line isn't capable of opening gaping holes.

Imani Cross looked average, especially behind a so-so line. If he ran behind a good line that pushed downhill, we can see him being a difference-maker. NU doesn't have that. Braylon Heard impressed us, looking faster and more decisive. He actually got to the corner once, turned the corner, and cut inside for extra yards. We never expected to see that out of him.

So, it's off to the City of Angels---one of the most disgusting places on Earth. Bo Pinelli thinks the trip to California will be productive, especially considering NU recruits there and is "fairly productive" there. Smart guy. Who wouldn't be on the lookout for the next Martinez or Meredith or Eric Martin? Mediocre programs don't survive without second-tier players from the Golden State. (Scan the roster link, and e-mail us back with any difference-makers that you see who hail from CA.)

All for now....we'll offer more complete analysis next week after seeing a truer test. Enjoy your short week.....PYB.


  1. God, you're a hater. WTF, dude. It's the scheme. Occupy the O-line and let the LB's roam to make plays. How many times have I told you that?


  2. not anymore dildo, have you read a newspaper in the last six months?