Sunday, May 26, 2013

Four-Arm Shiver

PYB checks in after 10 days away, while ESPN rambles on about Everett Golson not being enrolled at Notre Dame anymore. Is this a big story? Our apologies for the absence--let's get to it:

--Wondering if the Nebraska baseball team can patch together enough IP with its ragged collection of arms to win the Big Ten+2 tournament today in Minneapolis. Can the Huskers get above .500 for the first time all year and provide the first small ray of sunshine since the dark days of the Mike Anderson "Era"? For a team that's been maddeningly inconsistent, it will be a tall task. Either way, the team's refusal to go quietly has to be attributed to Darin Erstad's influence of competitiveness and toughness.

--Sergio Garcia. Is he for real? With all the material he could have used to slam Tiger Woods, he went with a racist shot -- and the most cliche one at that. PYB has never hated Garcia like many do, but we'll now admit that he should never play in the United States again. The amount of shit he will take from galleries from this point forward will be too much to overcome, especially for someone who's been historically unable to block out minor distractions.

--Speaking of pussies, Eric Crouch has jammed himself into the news again ... attention whore that he is. We are just glad he didn't call a 'press conference' like he didn't when announcing his retirement for a professional football career that never began. Well, the latest scream for relevance is not necessarily news but it's on a web site. Anyhow, let's address all the fucking bullshit contained in just a few paragraphs:
  • He says he could have been an All-Pro NFL receiver. False. Not enough size or moves. And no heart. Bad combo.
  • Height claiming to be 5 feet 11 3/4. No way. We stand 6 1 3/4 and towered over him the one time we stood next to him.
  • Crouch blames his lack of pro success on injuries and being in a new town. "Everything was stacked against me." Welcome to the real world, where every 22-year-old goes through the same experience. So what did he do rather than push through adversity? Quit and run home to Omaha, just like he did when he lost the starting QB job to Bobby Newcombe. But he could have been an All-Pro in the most ferocious league in sports.
  • He says he could have been a perfect fit for today's read-option NFL offenses. No chance. Scatter-armed at best. Not elusive in the pocket. No field vision. It was Eric run right. Eric run left. In the NFL, that gets a QB killed. Ask Vince Young and Robert Griffin, two much more talented QBs, how that goes. Nobody outruns the NFL.
  • He believes Mike Martz loses sleep over his disastrous tenure with the St. Louis Rams.
--On a non-sports related note, the Boy Scouts of America now allow gay kids into the organization. Questions to ponder: how many 12-year-old kids know they are gay and need to 'come out', and how many Boy Scouts have had sex before age 25 anyway?

--Jeff Overton tees off after getting DQ'd at The Colonial. Good stuff. Too bad his name wasn't Woods, they'd surely have created a new policy to keep him in the tournament.

--Are the Miami Heat in trouble? We can't tell you yet, although their inability to shake the Chicago Bulls and Indiana Pacers has to be cause for concern. What we do know is that Princess Dwyane continues to lose credibility....the latest reason being a cheap-shot elbow to the side of Lance Stephenson's head. We'll see if David Stern has the balls to suspend him -- or if crossing the players' box with your feet during an on-court melee is still a worse offense than a forearm to someone's temple.

All we got for now....!

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