The Bitch Came Out With a Bag of Ya-o

--Straight from the Meaningless Department, E.T. Woods has fired Steve Williams. Well, 10 percent of Woods' 2011 winnings of just over $500k (and we all know Tiger is cheap and probably paid seven percent) is $50k+ and makes Williams a working stiff like most the rest of the country. He can now man the bag for Adam Scott and his belly putter, as Scott continues to underachieve.

--Go Cubs Go. After blowing a late 2-0 lead last night, Chicago's North Siders take another bottle blasting from the Phillies in today's matinee and slip 21 games under .500. So it's true, having MLB's worst GM will get you the worst team in the league.

--The NFL lockout may end. Wake us when all the BS is over, including preseason games, and when the real games start.

--"Six feet tall, but I feel like Yao Ming..." Sad day to see the official premature end of his career. But at least he ain't Greg Oden.

--Finally, a belated congrats to Darren Clarke on his British Open win. We were pulling for Tits Mickelson, who pissed away all his hard work on the back nine on Sunday. But Clarke was hard not to root for also. Why can't a good guy win every year and stiffs like David Duval and Stewart Cink exclude themselves from the party instead of ruining our Major Sundays? Anyway...

That's all we have for now. We'll add more as we settle into our new digs (30,000 square foot high-rise office downtown) and some real sports news happens. For now, we're off for some AWESOME food at PF Chang's...our MSG level is running a tad low....