Not Cool Man

--Bo Pinelli says there's a dropoff from the first-team linebacking crew (they suck) to the second team? That's scary.

--Bubba Watson was the best-case scenario during Masters viewing yesterday, once it became apparent that Hefty wasn't going to overcome his brain-dead fourth hole because the putts weren't dropping. The rest was a pack of personality-less nerds: Oosthuizen, Westwood, Kuchar, Hanson, et al. What a deflating Sunday.

--Meanwhile, Sergio Garcia has given up. Tiger Woods is still an irrelevant golfer and disrepectful person. And Phil can still be delusional, saying after the round that being on the wrong part of the fourth green was 'dead.'

--Somebody is lying here: coaches or player? Start as a freshman?? If you're any good, you could go a whole year at NU without seeing more than five passes your way!

--Too bad Demarcus Cousins is a douche, because his dead-on assessment of the ultimate studio gangster Blake Griffin was dead on. Unfortunately, it will be dismissed as sour grapes when it is a fact. Don't believe us? Let's pull the college tapes.

--Speaking of douchebags, look everyone Carmelo scored 43 points and beat the Chicago Bulls in OT!! Of course he shot 31 times, missed countless open shooters and the wing and was aided by a rusty Derrick Rose in his first game back from a groin pull. But it's all good in Melo's world, as long as he's the center of attention -- win or lose.

Let's hope the rest of this week is more inspiring than the Easter/Masters Sunday that was!

Go Cubs Go

One game. One blown lead. Another tank job by Carlos Marmol. Who's got the Cubs unders??

Who can't wait for Carlos Marmol to leave the Cubs and become the best closer in MLB? Book it!

68-94.

Go Cubs Go!

Editor's Note: Since this post....Kerry Wood and Marmol blew another game.....0-2.

Season on the Brink

PYB has been a bit absent since its return, mostly because nothing has triggered our bitterness and partly because it's a semi-slow news time. But, in hopes of starting this week off on a more productive foot we give you the following (we're working on adding a picture for this entry, but blogspot.com is being a piece of shit right now):

--The NCAA semifinal basketball game between Ohio State and Kansas was rigged. Was David Stern in building? Are we supposed to believe the the Buckeyes dominate the Jayhawks, as expected, in the first half and then can't do anything correctly in the second half? Are we supposed to believe those BS whistles on Deshaun Thomas were legitimate? Are we supposed to believe that Thad Matta went to the Roy Williams School of NCAA Tournament coaching during the 20-minute halftime break? No. No. No.

--The Nebraska baseball team dropped its weekend series at Northwestern. Ouch. How long until some dildo sports writer refreshes his "Northwestern has Nebraska's number in every sport" angle? It was already done after NU's basketball loss, we'd expect it to have happened already, if all the local beat writers weren't stroking it to the tape of Taylorina's "new" throwing motion...

Either way, this is not a good thing for Darin Erstad's team. An NCAA bid was improbable due to the fact that Mike Anderson ruined the program, didn't recruit well and scheduled like shit. Losses like this cement that fate.

--Sure, Donovan McFlabb was washed up when he was in Washington. But hopefully that doesn't camouflage the fact that he's right on all accounts: Mike Shanahan thinks it's still 1999 and Robert Griffin should be playing his home games on turf, indoors, if not both. (See Michael Vick in games after October 15). Herschel Walker thinks the Redskins overtraded for Griffin.

--Speaking of Griffin, and his Heisman Trophy from last December. We have two questions that we never posed concerning the award ceremony: 1. Why was a woman handling the podium announcement? 2. Why did she shout with glee "Robert Griffin....R G 3!" when she read his name? Like she was so happy that he beat all the other finalists? Like it was...uh...rigged???! Like the Heisman shares a home city with David Stern's office? The Heisman hasn't been legitimate in 25 years, but any last shred of dignity it had went out the window at that moment.

--Bonus question: if you guess correctly and tell us whether Taylorina is throwing a real pass route or a pass for a game of 500 here, you'll win a special prize (a copy of "Bounce: Behind the Velvet Rope") But according to his new 'coach,' as long as his feet are set properly he's good to go! That, and he drops back farther! And doesn't panic! Jesus.

--Lastly, Dirk Chatelain tries too hard in his expose column about Tim Miles, but there's some great background information about the new NU basketball coach. Read it, just try not to throw up after reading the overly syrupy delivery. Dirk, you're not Robert Frost....just get the nuts and bolts out there and save us about 500 unecessary words....

All for now, as PYB decides who to wager on tonite. Is the public right to jerk off the Kentucky squad, that nevers seems focused, skilled or particulary good outside of shotblocking? Or will the NCAA rig another game to keep Kansas close? Decisions, decisions....

Outfoxed

Let's get things rolling with some quick hitters before we have to trude off to work:

--Congratulations to UNC Basketball Coach Roy Williams! He finally got Kansas to the Final Four! Sure, Roy's Tarheels were beat up, but this was the lock of the century given the injuries and the fact that Williams is a terrible game coach. "Two possessions"???!

--Spring football practice has started, and Barney Cotton has started to shuffle his linemen around already. Is he making room for excuses next fall or for one of his daughters to get playing time?

--Has anyone else seen the mess that LaPhonso Ellis calls hair during his announcing stints on ESPN and recoiled in horror? Here's a picture from what had to be two years and 10 pounds ago....

--Pussy Blake Griffin is back to what he did in college--taking cheap shots at lesser teams and players. A few days after being cleaned out by Jason Smith (deservedly, we're sure), Griffin took a swipe at Trevor Ariza. We all surely know he'd never do this to anyone his size and apparently was too chickenshit to brawl Smith on the spot when the first incident happened. We'd love to see what the 1990s NY Knicks would do to him....We'd also like to see what they'd do to Chris Paul when he began strutting around like a peacock when his team was blowing out the lowly New Orleans Hornets.

--Haste makes waste, Mr. Osborne. This would have been a no-brainer hire in Lincoln, if the AD wasn't so enthralled with installing a altar boy as basketball coach.

--Bad weekend in Florida for the boys of summer: Jabba Chamberlain snaps his ankle, Bobby Jenks racks up a DUI, and Matt Bush adds to his trophy case of alcohol-related offenses by fleeing the scene this time. Fine work, gentlemen. If this injury doesn't derail Chamberlain's career, a 5+ ERA will.

--Thanks to CBS for further ruining the NCAA Basketball Tournament, which was formerly the perfect event. The Skycam and other horrible angles they continually use make the games unwatchable. Spare us.

--Josh Howard is out for the rest of the NBA season. No surprise. We were more surprised to find out he was still in the league.

All for now....try to contain your excitement as spring football rolls on and MLB's Opening Day nears!!

Miles Away

PYB definitely has been flattered during our semi-excused absence over the last week, as several readers have chimed in asking us our take on what was the NU basketball coaching search and then ultimately the selection and hiring of Tim Miles. We know just as much as any of you: nothing.

That said, we had a nagging feeling and predicted Athletic Director Tom Osborne would botch this hire. We won't know whether that feeling is warranted for at least four years. We do know, though, that the reason Osborne gave for dropping the axe on Ken Sadler was that the program had 'lost momentum' and needed a change in course. So, instead of changing course, TO went right back to where NU has always gotten its hoops coaches.....a program where the coach got his barely relevant team to a 20-win season or two. Uninspiring (just like this Randy York rah-rah piece on huskers.com--what a piece of shit), to say the least....and hardly an immediate momentum changer.

Osborne should definitely be criticized for not openly pursuing Larry Eustachy, who has gotten control of his personal life and led Southern Mississippi to a basketball revival in Hattiesburg. Of all people, TO should know about second chances. Apparently, you can beat the shit out of women and get back in the game but you can't overcome a drinking problem and get another job.

TO should also take heat for publicly admitting he took counsel on the hire from Craig Bohl, Ndamukong Suh and Bill Doleman. In Suh and Doleman, you have two great NU guys. But what the fuck do I care what a football player or a television announcer thinks about hiring a basketball coach? We know just as much or more about the game of basketball than either one of those men. In Bohl, you have the second-worst defensive coordinator in school history and a guy who couldn't succeed at a top-tier school and had to run for cover in the lower ranks, ie Dana Altman. A pathetic move by Osborne, to put it mildly.

As much as we refuse to blindly rave about hiring a completely unknown entity, we won't hate on Miles and his chances at NU for now. PYB knows that Osborne is a savvy businesman, but his track record of hiring coaches is somewhere in the range of terrible to incomplete-at-best (Solich, Pinelli, Erstad). So, we'll sit back, see if Miles has a strategy, see if he can execute that strategy, and see if he can make Nebraska basketball more than a punch line.

Miles had some good punch lines of his own at his introductory press conference Saturday, but Sadler had plenty of good jokes and hillbilly charm to go around too. Sadler knew the Xs and the Os, he just couldn't get a game-changer to come to the stark-white surroundings of the Star City. Even if Miles can't coach for shit, it'll be worth a few seasons of Edmund Exley/LA Confidential jokes.

So, in a Cornhusker world where erecting multi-million dollar buildings has been substituted for raising championship banners, we get to bask in what are now our happiest days as Nebraska fans. Days with press conferences announcing new coaching hires and the promise of better days ahead have supplanted victory celebrations, Directors Cup relevance and the pride the state could glean from fielding excellent teams across the entire athletic department.

Whoever said "If you build it, they will come" was a fucking liar.

PYB will return from the road soon...

Feel Alright

PYB is headed out of town and will chime in via Twitter only for a few days....as we go, a few quick thoughts:

--The NCAA has somehow succeeded in ruining what was the last pure sporting event---the men's basketball tournament. Play-in games, multiple TV networks, etc. have this thing circling the shitter. So we can't submit our brackets until late Wednesday night because teams that could legitimately win after their play-in games are in the field (Cal)? Why the fuck aren't all the play-ins involving 16 seeds instead of some of them being between 14 seeds? And why on earth do they call the first-round games the "second-round" games, just because there are a few pointless play-in games in dirty Dayton arena on Tuesday and Wednesday? Jesus.

The meltdowns that Iona and MVSU put together last night prove that none of these teams deserve to be playing in anything above the NIT. The watered-down nature of college basketball makes filling out a bracket nothing more than a spin of the roulette wheel.

--Braylon Heard: permanent, one-game move to cornerback? We're fine.

--Danny Manning? We still have a strong feeling that TO is going to butcher this hire--badly. Well, at least Manning would be better than Mike Davis.

--Inspired NU golf coverage by the Omaha World Herald. What the OWH left out was the team's impressive finish, behind only perennial powers Idaho, UMKC, South Dakota State and Illinois State.

--Nice Brandon Marshall trade, Chicago. Less than 12 hours after getting the headcase WR, we find out he 'allegedly' beat a bitch in da club last week.

--Also glad to see the Washington Redskins blow their wad on trying to get smallish QB Robert Griffin. They went to Herschel Walker-esque proportions to leverage their future for a player who needs to be on turf and preferably indoors in the NFL. Griffin to Niles Paul doesn't sound likely to us.

That's all we got for now....enjoy what's left of the Big Dance. Try not to get too excited about spring football....ZZZzzzzzzz.....